Being a good lover

Being horny is not a sin.
It's what the person decides to do while being horny determines the sin.

I'm sure it's easy to feel like the whole idea of having those urges makes a person perverted.
Well it is perverted to those urges are expressed through sexual acts that are opposite of what God intended for.
For one, those urges are natural.
It does not mean we have to act upon our urges, but they are there for a reason.
I can think about reasons, yet at the same time I'm not sure. So let's see.

Humans are creatures that have sex for procreation, which can be seen as the sole purpose of being a living being.
Those urges motivates these humans for procreation, therefore it fits in.
The average human desires company, and deters from putting themselves through loneliness.
And sex requires at least 2 people, making that a possible way of not feeling lonely.

I'm no expert on biology (nor any of the sciences), so take what I say with caution.
But one of the chemicals in our body that stuck out to me was oxytocin.
This chemical is produced in our body when we come into contact with other people.
Holding hands, kissing, cuddling.
And this chemical explodes into our body system when we have an orgasm.

What does this chemical do?
It's a chemical for commitment, making us feel committed to this person whom we have in contact with.
Which makes sense if you think about marriage, where there are 2 people who are suppose to stay together much longer than today's marriages.

But what happens when people have one night stands?
Well while the body is telling them that they should be committed to this girl he just banged, the next day they  live their lives knowing that there is no real relationship between them.
This also applies to masturbation, where it is basically having sex with yourself.
Oxytocin creates the feeling of commitment, but this time to yourself. Which translates into 'selfishness', or where sex becomes something to pleasure yourself.

Cause in a marriage, (again, I've got no references on hand, so think for yourself), well in marriage according to the bible, can be see as a couple that has great orgasmic sex.
Apparently Soloman has a whole chapter in the Bible about how he was romantically wooing this woman.
But it makes sense that in the marriage, the couple are not just having sex for procreation.
Rather their urges are satiated through having sex with each other, which in return helps their marriage and makes it harder to for affairs to happen.

- - - - -

Why am I talking about this again?
Maybe because I know all of this, feels motivated to see myself being a good lover, yet still cannot defeat masturbation.
I know, I can't beat sexual temptation through will-power, but I don't see myself fighting a good fight.
I feel lonely, I want to be satisfied, and I've been giving up.
I feel stressed because somebody around me has been giving me a hard time, I feel inferior because I'm not doing as well in school, and where I work is has been giving me a harder time ever since the boss's daughter started working.

I feel weak, don't want to acknowledge that. Because what does acknowledging it do?
Wouldn't it be better to fight it, telling myself that I am good enough?
I'm just so tired of things not going my way.... and thinking like that is quite idiotic no?